Friday, February 15, 2013

The Gold That Wasn't Needed

I have been reading through the bible chronologically (which I'm really enjoying) and have been really encouraged by a certain section in Exodus.

The latter part of the book includes details (after details) about the building of the sanctuary, the place where God met with His people. It describes how God put special skill in people to do all sorts of work that was needed to complete the building. And the people were more than willing to bring what they had. Their skill, their possessions, whatever was needed they brought freely. Until one of the overseers told Moses:

"The people bring much more than enough for doing the work that the Lord has commanded us to do." So Moses gave command, and word was proclaimed throughout the camp, "Let no man or woman do anything more for the contribution for the sanctuary." So the people were restrained from bringing, for the material they had was sufficient to do all the work, and more." (Exodus 36:4-7)

I can't help but think about the man who had just decided to take a leave from his job in order to help with the sanctuary. Or the women who was in the middle of sorting through her jewelry with a pile of gold to bring for them to melt down and use for another purpose. I can image how eager they were to bring what they had to offer, and how disappointed they may have been when they heard they weren't needed anymore.

We all desire to be valuable and appreciated. Our response when our offering isn't needed reveals who it is we are seeking value and appreciation from. Is the offering of those whose gold never got melted down any less valuable than those whose Gold became the mercy seat?

It is not a matter of whose name is on what brick, whose hand wove what curtain, whose gold became this or that. It is not even a matter of what got used, and what didn't. It is a matter of what each offering meant between the individual and God.

And it still means that today. I don't believe that God gives us gifts or resources for nothing, and if you feel like you are sitting on the bench asking God to put you in the game, perhaps you are in a season of waiting, or learning. And I would bet there is a way that you can serve right where you are. The truth is that sometimes the gifts, resources and skills that we have are needed in a public sort of way. And sometimes they are not. Jesus sees and is honored by both.

This is a lesson for me in my current season where my primary role is to be a mother. There have been times for my songs to be heard by the thousands, and then there are times that my songs are meant for my two little red headed kids. And both are an offering of the gifts that God has given me.

It is always good to ask, whose appreciation am I seeking? Who is my offering for?

Will post both places for now

Well, since I've had several people tell me they can't connect to an RSS feed from, I will continue to post blogs here as well. I'll do both places for now. Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Reminder of new blog location

Just a reminder if you are still linked to this site that I am now posting my blogs on, please continue on to that site.  Thanks!

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Now blogging at

From here on out I will be blogging from my site rather than this one. Please make a note if you have an RSS feed or follow this blog.

I know I've been out of it this year so if you're reading this, THANK YOU for sticking with me!

This has been a crazy year for me and I'm starting to feel somewhat normal again so I'm hoping to blog more than 3 times in 2013 ;)

Monday, October 8, 2012


It is such a year of learning I really do not know where to begin. The kind of year you can’t turn back, the kind of change you can’t undo. So I move forward with prayers of “Oh Lord...I need You”. The curtain has been pulled on my lesser gods and any false sense of security I had has been shattered. I feel smaller and more humbled than I ever have and yet, more confident in who I am. 

It is such a year of pruning that I do not know what will be left when we reach the end. 
I desire an outward change to display the inward swelling tides but nothing seems safe from vanity or pride so I wear the same shoes and comb my hair in the same way. 

I have less to prove and I pray that tomorrow there is even less until it is nothing. Nothing to boast, save the Grace I have in Jesus. 

Surrender is where child like faith and wisdom work together. It can not be forced or driven by guilt and that is where every knot in my stomach was tied. Surrender daily...I am learning. I do not expect a certain outcome nor do I feel entitled to anything. 

So when the page is turned over at the end of this long year...when the calendar resets and my heart says...again...surrender...again. 

I will. 

For the Lord has been good to me.  

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

On Moving to Portland 2

We moved to Portland in the middle of winter. In the middle of the rainy season that we quickly realized was not just a myth, it really does rain here like...all. the. time. But I don’t mind. I didn’t mind the long days in february watching the drops of water form patterns on the windows as I cuddled up with my kids and drank coffee. Lots of coffee. My friend here says the rain is why coffee is so popular in Portland, she calls it liquid sunshine. 
Those first weeks were tiresome. I would miss my exit on the interstate and find myself heading the wrong direction with crying children in the backseat. I found out the hard way what roads to avoid during rush hour and which lanes downtown are for buses, bikes, or trains, and NOT for cars. I auditioned different grocery stores and attempted to memorize where every green space is on the city map. It will take me years to know Portland the way I know Nashville. Learning a city as an eager 18 year old is much different than learning a city as a mother of two. But we are getting along just fine, Portland and I. 
I was reminded recently by a pastor that dead things do not change, but living things always do. 
If I hold too tightly to a living thing it will wiggle right out of my hands and find an open space to grow more freely. But if I hold it with an open hand I will get to watch it bloom and flourish right in front of my eyes. My children are an obvious example of this and I am constantly learning how to hold them and protect them without inhibiting their changing and blossoming selves. 
And I am grateful for my own changing. For the tilling of the soil, the pruning of the branches to make room for more growth. It must only mean that we are alive. Praise God from whom all blessings flow... 

Monday, March 5, 2012

On Moving to Portland

I have moved from Nashville to Portland, Oregon. I have been trying to find the right words to explain to you, reader, what this move has been like for me. And I realize that I am still processing much of the change, and the words may come more fully later.

Let me just assure you that we have moved out here to follow Jesus. We have moved out here to chase after so many dreams we have for our family. We have moved out here because when one is on the banks of a river, a river you know has your name on it, and the waters suddenly rise, and the current starts to pull you along with have no choice but to let it take you.

Our river has taken us miles away from friends and family, from most everything we know, to a season of newness. Funny that I wrote the song “Springtime” last year, asking God for the new. I just didn’t know how exactly he was going to answer that prayer. New is not always easy. It is exciting and wonderful and full of God’s peace. But not easy.

When my daughter was born, just a few weeks before all of this became apparent, I started writing a song about change. The inevitability of change in this life. And how if I do not bend with it, it will surly break me. Little did I know an even bigger change was around the corner. I’m thankful God was already preparing my heart.

I will try to tell more of the story in the coming months. Will I continue to play music? Yes! The good news is that Portland has a host of rainy days, perfect for sitting at a piano pondering a lyric and a melody. :)